But You Will Always
by Harlequin Love
Summary: [ONESHOT] A warm feeling sparked in my chest, like the one I felt years ago. It was a love rekindled and it warmed my soul like nothing else ever could. R&A. under construction


A/N: I like Akane. If you don't like her, get out of here! Go find those weird Kasumi/Ranma fics! Shoo! There will be general angst, I suppose. Untimely Character deaths and there will be no bashings! NONE!

**Title: **But You Will Always

**Rating: **PG-13

**Summary: **One-Shot. I want it to be vague... just a number of character deaths and only one point of view.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Ranma 1/2 or the song 'My Immortal.

"Speaking"

_Thoughts_

* * *

**  
But You Will Always

* * *

**

**I'm so tired of being here

* * *

**

I blinked as the light outside my window shined onto my closed eyelids, waking me up.

I sat up, and just stared, with a pained expression etched on my tired face, remembering the past that haunted me still. I woke up after a few moments from my reverie and stretched a little reflexively, yawned and got up like an ancient man.

I ignored the loud snoring in the room.

I folded my beddings quietly, careful not to wake my father, and padded down the stairs to the bathroom.

My footsteps echoed in my ears throughout the quiet house.

_It is still early in the Morning_, I thought to myself.

I slid the bathroom door open and started my usual morning ritual that I started since.....since that day.

The doctor said it would help to just accept the passing if I did as if things were ok, but I should do things differently.

But I wish it never happened and I would never accept it.

* * *

**Suppressed by all of my childish fears

* * *

**

I gripped the side of the sink but then I slowly began to relaxed.

_I have to, to move on_, I thought to myself, but I felt like throwing up when I thought the words.

To move on without her by my side, it was so wrong to me on so many levels.

After a few slow breaths, I walked out of the bathroom and went back to my room.

I packed my schoolbag with the usual things, a pencil, paper, and a textbook.

I slung it over a shoulder and left the house without breakfast.

I wouldn't be able to take another meal with them again without breaking down. With the silence, the heavy, strangely loud, silence.

It echoed everything that wasn't said, and the past of noise, joy, life and emotions.

Nothing was the same.

* * *

**And if you have to leave**

**

* * *

**

They all left me alone when they realized that it wasn't them that I truly, completely and devotedly loved, once again, they left me to heal.

If I could ever heal.

They saw that I was not going to take a 'maybe' for an answer.

That I was an empty shell of my former self, I lost a part of my soul.

I passed them sometimes; me ignoring them and them looking at me wistfully and so sadly.

Because we all lost something that day.

"Hey." A deep voice said from behind me.

I turn around.

It was just Him.

"Hey." I responded back. We start walking, me leading.

* * *

**I wish that you would just leave

* * *

**

He wasn't bitter, I knew.

At least not with me.

He was bitter that she was gone; bitter that he did everything he could but failed, bitter about the whole thing, almost.

I now knew why he did all those things to me, because he wanted me to feel what he felt.

He came to see her often but strangely enough, he ran into me all the time trying to find the darn place.

He came every two weeks.

So I lead him there every time.

Every heart-wrenching, air-out-of-my-lungs, bitterness-sweeping-through-out-my-whole-body… time.

We didn't fight anymore, our spirits of fire died with the woman we loved.

The tiger and the lion met eye to eye to this.

* * *

**Because your presence still lingers here**

**

* * *

**

A ghost of a feeling past over me as he and I sat there.

Silent we were and sometimes I could feel her next to me looking over the town with me.

Like her laughter or her angry shout, anything that symbolized her would have been welcome.

I would have even told her that I loved her for her to stay or at least take me with her.

"Let's go. You're probably late for school." He said listlessly.

We got up and left with our hearts still heavy. We always left with them heavy.

* * *

**And it won't leave me alone

* * *

**

I waved Him good-bye, not cheerfully, but simply, as a gesture.

I pass through the gates and head to my classroom without a care about the teacher. He told me to wait outside; holding buckets, like that ever solved anything.

It was two minutes before it happened.

The wind picked up, gushing from an open window. I looked around irritably as it brushed my black bangs around.

It reminded me how the wind would blow a breeze her way in just the right times, making my heart flutter and beat rapidly.

Reminded of her face, her eyes, her hair....my heart raced and ached at the same time, just from the memory of it. The way she smiled or scowled, everything she did was something I will…. love forever.

* * *

**These wounds won't seem to heal**

**This pain is just too real**

**

* * *

**

Some say that a relationship should start on friendship.

Laughter will always bubble inside me when I think of the first time I met her.

All the firsts with her, especially my first love.

My blood pounding in my ears, I gasped suddenly.

I felt like there was something huge missing from my chest.

Like I lost a lung, my stomach and liver.

_What do you know?_ I thought to myself bitterly once again.

_It really does hurt there._

I dropped the buckets as I grabbed the cloth of my shirt over my heart, where it hurt. I fell to my knees, clenching my teeth at the pain and gave a shout finally. The scrape of chairs quickly followed and gasps at me.

I black out as I glared fruitlessly at them to help.

* * *

**There's just too much that time cannot erase

* * *

**

I wake up once again, to a white room.

I hate white rooms.

I prop myself up and see my doctor walk in. He checks the regular stuff, pulse, and eyes, whatever.

But he murmured something that brings the pain back in a whole new wave of torture.

"But it's been so long... "

I clutch at my chest, wanting the pain to go away. My doctor tries to stop the pain, but to no effect.

I knew what was wrong and he knew too.

Everyone knew but there was nothing anyone could do. I'm not even sure magic would do anything either.

It hurt somewhere where no one had ever found a cure for.

It went beyond the physical and mental plane.

My pain went as deep as the soul.

Heartbreak.

* * *

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

* * *

**

No one can say that I never went far in caring for her or protecting her.

Her pain was mine a hundred times fold.

When she would cry, I would try to hand her a tissue without looking like I cared.

Even when things got very bad, somehow we would be back together in the end.

Some things were meant to be.

At first she took my brashness and selfish ways at heart, but as she became a part of me, she saw.

We were a part of each other that we saw through the other's lies and fronts. She and I lost the connection at times but when she listened to her heart, she could finally see.

She told me this.

She said that was why she always forgave me, taking my hand again. Smiling so my spirits would lift to high heavens.

* * *

**When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

* * *

**

A scream from her was all I needed to beat the tar out of anything and everything.

Her terror activated something in me that pushed me to my limits and helped me soar past the fine line of 'humanly possible'.

Was that what love did?

Love pushed almost everything away except itself.

It is a selfish emotion.

I defeated everything that threatened her, that would have harmed her, not to mention everything I cared for, my experience would be valued.

I could have never done it without her, my light in the darkness.

She…she was many people's light, shining to them to flock to her, just as chaos flocked to me.

I lived and fought for her, pummeling what frightened her so that she could smile up at me, hug me, say my name in just simple… such simple… relief.

The way she would say my name in a scream, my strength was suddenly immeasurable at times, yet it sometimes wasn't enough.

The old pervert defeated me at times, the old ghoul, and our friends. I was never completely sure that I could trust them with her, so I was always on my toes.

* * *

**And I've held your hand through all of these years**

**But you still have all of me

* * *

**

Our time together was short in my perspective, even though it seemed like an eternity.

Our happy routine was perfect throughout the morning, noon, afternoon and night.

Love could make it last but I wish it really did last forever.

Reality had never hit me so hard before and I wish it wasn't with all my soul, because of her.

I had been so shy with this love concept, it made me feel vulnerable to her so I tried to give her a reason to make me feel more secure.

The pain gave me comfort. It was something from her, telling me that she cared for me in a strange way.

I'm not even sure that I will marry anyone else, even though we never went as far as an innocent and sometimes accidental kiss.

The simple touch of handholding made me fall in love with her all over again.

Hell, her smile was enough to turn me into jelly.

She has my heart and she will never let it go, I know.

I know.

* * *

**You used to captivate me**

**By your resonating light

* * *

**

She was so bright at times, yet dark too.

Hard, then soft. Strong but weak, cold and hot, touchable and untouchable.

I had never dealt with a girl that I loved or cared so deeply for that matter and so I kept making the same mistake over and over again.

When I lost, she cheered me on. She cheered on enemies even.

She got down too, but when people cheered her on, she got her spirit of fire right back.

She was amazing that way.

I'm not sure what made me fall in love with her.

She was cute, yes, like a basket of puppies, but the Others were too.

She was beautiful at times, hinting at the future that she would be devastating and striking, but again, like the Others.

Maybe it was her soul. I could see it reflected in those brown orbs of hers, touching my own.

Would it have mattered that I met her first? Or last in cases?

Something about her would always make me think about her, even if I met the Others first, something inside her there was a light that I was drawn to.

* * *

**But now I'm bound by the life you left behind**

**Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams

* * *

**

I'm not sure what people expect of me.

I see people looking at me when I'm out but I ignore them. I think they expect me to run to the Others. But I would never hurt her again.

I vowed that.

They don't understand how I felt so strongly about her, but didn't they see?

Weren't they there?

I beat him, I killed him for her salvation, her safety, her life.

For her, to come back into my life, to shout, to laugh, to speak to me again.

Why couldn't they see...

I love her.

* * *

**Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me

* * *

**

I'd have dreams, or nightmares, and I'll wake up screaming, but that's all right after a moment.

I realize that she's just resting and waiting impatiently for me to hurry up, like always. As much as I want to, I still have duties and she understands that.

Doesn't mean that she isn't impatient.

I know she wanted me to finish school; I know how much it meant to her and take care of family and friends.

The closest friends to comfort, family duties to fulfill, she knows what I have to do.

I have to walk the lonely earth a while longer.

* * *

**These wounds won't seem to heal**

**This pain is just too real**

**There's just too much that time cannot erase**

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears**

**When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears**

**And I've held your hand through all of these years**

**But you still have all of me**

**

* * *

**

It's been many years.

I know she has been waiting a long time.

Her father died happy knowing his other daughters were well married.

My own parents are still alive

My mother is disappointed that I never married but she understands.

I adopted my cousin's son, orphaned, which my mother was content with and I trained him.

He is as strong as me in my youth, able to take on most and all he needs is a love to fight for.

But I will tell him my story, how he will know it how we were seperated and my mistakes, the mistakes that he should never make.

* * *

**I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone**

**

* * *

**

I know she's moved on in a sense, but I always feel her by my side.

As time went by, I could feel her presence that comforted and reminded me.

If I heard her voice, I knew I would have gone mad, crazy.

My cousin's son doesn't quite understands as I tell him about it, but he gets it enough, he and I have been on a few adventures already. But I knew he really needed to experience love, to feel it's own individual power.

So I engaged him to my old rival's daughter.

The boy's name is Hiko.

The girl's name is Akane.

* * *

**And though you're still with me

* * *

**

I gasped in pain and had one of my 'things' again. Hurt just the same, like a fresh stab right into my chest.

When Hiko came back, he tiredly told me how his day went with his fiancée and said that he would dip me in hot oil if he weren't so tired.

I laughed and he gave me the evil eye.

I told him he could complain as much as he wanted but he was stuck with her.

I couldn't say her name. I would stutter at the most and I didn't want to seem so sad when saying her name with Hiko there.

Akane had long black hair and her mother's eyes. Lovely girl if she didn't have her father's temper, yet she wasn't missing most of her common sense.

* * *

**I've been alone all along

* * *

**

I can hear Hiko's even breathing as he slept and wondered if his heart fluttered yet when Akane would smile at him.

I wondered if they even held hands yet and he just didn't tell me out of embarrassment...

Unbidden, a smile formed in my mind, then a small cute nose. Hazel eyes appeared, framed by black blue hair. It was the second day from when I first met her, the sunset behind her and suddenly the whole day was a blur to me then. Everything was a blur.

_What do I say?! Do I even say anything?!!_ I thought in panic. _Is it possible for this chick to be....cute?_

The memory gave another dull ache and I sighed. Even if Hiko was there, I felt alone.

I couldn't feel her presence that much anymore, which worried me.

Maybe I never felt her presence to begin with; maybe it was my mind trying to help me recover from her passing.

* * *

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears**

**When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears**

**And I've held your hand through all of these years**

**But you still have all of me

* * *

**

Hiko came home, practically skipping with joy. I asked what happened, even though I had a suspicion.

He told me in a rush, I barely got it and then I grinned.

I nodded at him and said I was taking a walk, hands shoved in my pocket and whistling.

I walked and walked straight to her grave.

I had stopped whistling by then and gave a small smile.

I felt the corner of my eyes wrinkle slightly as I did from age, but I didn't fret.

"Hiko finally kissed Akane." I told her. "I'm almost done. Wait for me."

Then I felt it again.

Her spirit passed through me and I heard a chirp of birds over head.

She was sending messages to me, to tell me that she approved.

"Thanks."

* * *

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears**

**When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears**

**And I've held your hand through all of these years**

**But you still have all of me . . . .**

**

* * *

**

Hiko finally married Akane.

I felt a tear slip in joy for my nephew and for myself.

I could finally let go.

Let go of this life with ease on my mind, heart and soul. I sighed in happiness.

I saw Hiko coming toward me, the little boy that I picked up from the orphanage disappearing as I looked at the man I had raised.

"Uncle.." Hiko started out hesitantly. "You aren't going to…"

"Hiko Saotome, I pass on the honor of owning the Tendo Dojo, being the holder of the Saotome secret techniques and the title of Master of Anything-Goes Martial Arts to you." I said, pride bursting from my words.

"Ranma, are you going to-- " Ryoga started out as he made his way here.

He still wore his ridiculous bandana but now his black hair was streaked with grey with the stress he gave himself, his eyes also wrinkled at the corners.

I gave him a disquieting smile that silenced him. "She's been waiting so long, Hibiki."

He struggled to return a forced smile. "I-I know."

"Should we wait for you?"

He shook his head. "No." He looked over his shoulder to Akari who was chatting away with Ukyo. "I have responsibilities too, and I shouldn't keep you two."

"It would be no problem. We may never see each other again." I told him. He gave a genuine grin this time except it was mischievous, flashing a bit of his fang.

"Don't worry Saotome, I'll chase you to the ends of Heaven and Hell for making Akane

wait so long."

I started to protest. "Hey-- "

He winked and was gone. I laughed; he was still in love with her too.

"Uncle..."

"Don't worry Hiko, you'll do fine. Everyone will help you two out." I hugged him and told him to name the first child Ranma.

"What if it's a girl?" Hiko asked, his cheeks tinged pink at the mention of a child. I sighed.

"I think a boy would suit the name better." I patted him on the shoulder and walked to my old acquaintances.

"Ran-Chan!" Ukyo exclaimed, and she ran over to hug me tightly.

Ukyo finally wore dresses, hers a pale purple and pink combination. She had one long streak of white in her long, still-gorgeous brown hair, her eyes wrinkled in the corners like everyone else, but they were small laughter wrinkles.

Her eyes have become wiser and more sensible, having children to raise.

"Hi, Ukyo." I said gently as I patted her head with care. "But I think I'm too old for that 'Chan' part of my name."

"No, you'll always be my Ran-Chan, nothing can change that." Ukyo said softly, pulling away from my chest. I could hear the tears in her voice and sure enough, her eyes were brimming with them.

I gave a small wave to her husband, Souji Osaka.

I had forced Ukyo to move on, for she couldn't wait forever to make me forget about Akane.

I grinned at the sight of their two girls, twins, Kari and Mari who ran after two boys, a purple-eyed boy and a boy with a bokken in hand. Teenagers were so rambunctious these days.

"I gotta go." I told her softly and she nodded tearfully.

"Bye...Ranma.."

I only had to wander for a little while till I was hit with a full force glomp.

"Hi, Shampoo."

"Hi Ranma!" Shampoo said in better Japanese then she did when Akane was here.

She had probably aged the best out of everyone. Her violet hair was still violet, but her large purple eyes were starting to wrinkle slightly.

_Secret Amazon Anti-aging Cream could only last for so long_, I thought to myself with a wry grin.

She wore more conservative dresses then before, but not much, a red dress with mid-calf slits on the side instead of up to her hips.

"You here to see Xiaoyu Lin?"

"Sure."

"Uncle Ranma..!" Xiaoyu sang as she glomped me too. I think she use to have a thing for me, and maybe it was still there, since she just winked at me.

She popped off and her purple-haired head bobbed up and down to find her dad and brother.

"So what do you really want Ranma?" Shampoo asked after Xiaoyu got out of earshot. I gave a small smile.

"To say good bye."

Shampoo's large purple eyes filled up with tears like Ukyo, but tears didn't affect me anymore. I had grown up and I knew that tears were necessary and people could shed as much as they wanted but it would not affect things that did not understand them.

Like dead people.

"Don't worry Shampoo, I'll say hi to Mousse for you." I wiped a tear that fell off onto her cheek. "And don't cry, I hate it when girls cry."

She nodded and walked away to her husband who had defeated her, a gaijin man with spiky black hair.

I sighed, and kept walking.

"Ranma-baby."

I made my face look apprehensive. "Nabiki... I'll pay you back later.."

Nabiki swatted my arm in annoyance. "What are you up to Saotome?"

"What, you don't know already?" I peered around her and spotted Kuno. "Still married to the idiot?"

"Well, I've invested very wisely, and I have made more money that you can dream of, Ranma." Nabiki said as she examined her expensively manicured nails.

"You can just admit that you love the fool." Nabiki gave me a look.

Her hair was still short, but she aged well too. She only had wisps of white hair and her face was as well as one could get without getting help. Her eyes were much sharper, wise, knowledgeable and smart.

"I can just kill him for you." I joked.

"What's wrong, Ranma? You aren't usually like this." Nabiki said with her eyes narrowed. "You're almost.... happy."

"It is because I'm going to say Sayonara." I said to her, my eyes glistening.

Nabiki dropped her hand with her expensive rings on them.

"But Ranma! You've lived so long without Akane and--"

"Yes," I said, interrupting her, lifting a hand up. "I have. But only to finish what has to be finished. For Akane's sisters to be ok without her worrying, the Dojo to be passed on to the best heir possible, for things to be alright without us to be there."

"It's too bad that Kasumi is having her baby already, but I left a note with Dr. Tofu. It'll be alright without Akane and me." I told her gently, taking her by the shoulders. "There are no more curses, rivals, fiancées, Princes and chaos to think about and it's time for me to go."

"So you stayed to clean up?"

"Don't say it like that. I'm saying goodbye at least, Akane never had that chance. But I know that you know... how much she loved you guys."

I hugged her briefly and gave a one-handed wave to everyone I knew, who were watching me silently walk out through the church. Some were crying, some were trying to avoid it.

Only Shampoo, Ukyo, Ryoga, Kuno, Hiko, Nabiki, Akane and the teenagers that stopped running matched my gaze to them.

"See you guys later, Nabiki."

I walked to the Akane's stone marking and stared down at it. The towns' lights at night danced across the words on them.

Wonderful daughter  
Best sister  
Greatest friend  
Kindest rival  
And loved by many,  
This Akane Tendo.

"And Feisty Fiancée." I murmured.

I sat in the wet grass near the tree regardless of my tuxedo. I sighed once and let the cold creep into me.

I fell asleep....

* * *

…………………. 

…I was in a white place.

I hated white places.

Still I waited and I heard the rustling of clothes. I turned and my eyes watered up immediately in happiness.

There she was, how I remembered last seeing her. Her large hazel eyes peered up at me in happiness, her mouth curving up in a small smile that meant everything, like she had successfully surprised me.

Her black blue hair cut short in a bob, bangs nearly into her eyes that brushed her peach skin lightly. She was wearing a white sweater and a pink shirt under that with a short navy blue skirt.

It was like all those years had never happened, that it was all a dream and Akane had woken me up to her amusement.

"And though I've held your hand through all these years....."

She held out her hand and motioned for me to walk with her. I reached and took it without hesitation.

A warm feeling sprung my chest, like the one I felt years ago, it was a love that rekindled at that moment and I warmed my soul like nothing else ever could.

I let her lead me to a light that I couldn't tell the source of, but still I followed her without any reservation.

I would never leave her again.

And she will never leave me again.

The light shined brightly in my eyes and I gripped Akane's hand tighter. The light became blinding white and I still walked forward.

The light felt like it was piercing my mind and I felt it consume me, leaving me nothing except for the feeling of Akane's hand and what it meant.

"_But you will always have all of me."_

___

* * *

_

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